Fonzation

Yesterday was my first day at my course at IBS. When I first walked in, they had name plates for each of the students which we had to pick up and place before us. To start with, the teacher was 20 mins late and it was extremely boring waiting for him; when I got there, there were only 3 other guys in the room but the front table was full of plates. When the teacheer finally showed up, most of the other people had shown up. As usual, I sat all the way at the back of the class, just like the good olds days in university:) When the lecture finally starts, the dude is speaking in arabic!! We are supposed to be in an english-speaking institute, yet he is speaking arabic. Well that was fine by me, but there was one Indian student who had to focus on the notes to understand. The good thing was that we were given a copy of his notes so no need to take notes, that was a relief. It was a 3 hour class during which we had a 15 minutes break, when I had a coffee and a cigarette. All in all, the material was diverse and had some interesting points, although I already know most of the stuff which is why I am looking forward to learning new stuff in later classes; the teacher knows what he is talking about but sucks at explaining stuff, is dull, and for some reason, I dont think he likes me. As annoying as it was having to attend classes again, it reminded me of the university days, best days of my life!

Working hours at the bank head office end at 2:30 but yesterday I walked out ay 7:30 in the evening so thats 12 hours of non-stop analysis of numbers and writing of financial reports, except for the hour I killed blogging:P Anyway, I had not had anything to eat except some biscuits in the morning so I passed by Jabriyah on my way home to pick up a sandwich for me and my dad, who for some reason likes Naif. So I went along with him. I parked next to Naif and walked into the place and started checking out the menu. Keep in mind that I worked 12 hours and had nothing to eat all day and was feeling very disoriented :P I was actually impressed cos I saw burger combos and hot dogs and stuff and was thinking "since when does Naif serve beef?" So I ordered what I wanted to order in the first place, chicken fillet combo, paid for it, and went outside to make a phone call while I waited for the food. I was pacing around talking on the phone with Soomi and I look up and I see Naif like 20 meters away. I WAS IN HARDEES!!!!! Damn I felt stupid!! :D

I was sitting on my desk sipping on a coffee very relaxed and I get a cool from the mandoob (bank representative) telling me to rush down to where they take the fingerprints for the residency. I told him I did it months ago and his reply was, "Someone spilled water on them!". I was speechless for a few seconds and all I said was, "You're kidding, right?" I went in to tell my boss and he was stunned. So I rush there and get the whole thing over and done with..... AGAIN and it was not better than my first experience. I was cussing the whole way there! It gets better.................

I'm supposed to finish off a case and present it by early tomorrow so was rushing back to work when I find a queue outside the parking lot, cars waiting in line to get in. It was too late to reverse cos more cars were behind me. So I had to wait. I sat in the car waiting for over 30 mins!! It gets better............











I finally get into the parking and I'm driving through 5 levels and couldnt find a single parking spot!! I was growing very impatient, although nobody is as patient as I am, and got very pissed off! What pissed me off ten times more was this one car parked taking two parking spaces. Damn I felt like flatenning his tires!!


Finally found a spot. Parked. And rushed to work thinking only about how much of an ass was the guy who took the two spots. For cases like this, I think we should prepare such people a surprise like this (below) :P Yes, thats tape all over the car :D

Last thursday I left a little early from work cos we had some relatives over for iftar and had to be there to greet them. So I am on the roads at around 4:30, and this was the first time I am out at that time. I expected the usual empty roads and smooth rides, but instead was faced with major traffic and many car accidents. The traffic is normal but the accidents were ridiculous. They are all because some people would be so hungry that their starvation makes them very stupid and blind and cant see others cars in front of them; all they think of is the delicous food awaiting them. One of the accidents was so ridiculous but the drivers from both cars decided to scream at each other and one thing led to another and they ended up beating the shit of each other; I couldnt picture the fight but you can see from the number of people standing and cars parked that there was something to look at.

This morning when I got out of the house, I was very shocked by the traffic. There was NO traffic!! At first I thought it was a thursday, so checked the calendar and........... its Wednesday. I'm telling you, the traffic stories in this country belong with the X-Files.... no explanation!! Yet, am not complaining, very smooth and chilled drive to work.

Last night was a small gathering for a friend, Iad. We all gathered up at Astra Lounge to bid him farewell, as he is leaving to Lebanon for good this morning. The only problem is that he wasnt there!!!! LOL..... poor guy got stuck with a cab driver who doesnt know the roads too well and ended up driving Iad in circles and never got there. We got there at 10:15 and left at 12:00 but.... no Iad:P He was very VERY pissed off and just went back home cos there was no point in coming anymore. I mean what the hell is up with the cab drivers in this country.... isnt it enough that they suck as drivers!! Now, people have to worry about getting to where they want to go?!? Make sure you ask the driver if he knows where you want to go before getting into the car with him, cos once you are in, you're stuck!! Sorry man, wish we could have seen you before you left. Best of luck man and we all envy you for going back to Lebanon!!

When I finally got to Koot Mall, I rushed out of the car coz I really had to go to the bathroom. What do you expect, driving all the way on Fahaheel Road past hilton!! Didnt know it was such a long drive till I got there, and worse, the traffic was insane! So when I got in, I looked to the left and saw this sign. You wont believe what I did!!! I actually thought that was a picture of a guy in a deshdasha and I rushed in only to find a bunch of ladies screaming at me... LOL!!! Then I turn around and see two security guards coming at me. At first they were pissed off and looked like they wanted to kick my ass, but when I explained to them what happened, they were cracking up! Plus I dont look like one of those desperate guys who spy on girls in the shower or the dressing room. LOL... what an experience!!

Every morning when I wake up, first thing I do is look out the window to check out the traffic only to see if I can manage to sleep an extra 5 minutes. And every time I look out, I see kids sitting on my car. They started off by standing next to it, then leaning on it, but recently sitting on it. I didnt bother with it before cos when I was in their shoes, we used to mess with the cars of those who told us to stay away from them:P Anyway, a few days ago, I lost it when I noticed the hood of one of our cars dented and it shows that a fat ass was on it. Yesterday morning, I saw a bunch of kids sitting on my car but I didnt go all crazy and rush down screaming at them; I played it smart. I noticed one of the kids lives in my building; so on my way down I took him aside and asked him "what would it take for you and your friends to stay off my car and make sure nobody else sits on it?" He said, "Well, I've been wanting one of those Lebanon stickers you have on your car". Luckily, I had 3 with me in the car, of different sizes; I gave him all 3 and he was more than willing to make the deal:) This morning, I woke up, looked out the window, and there was nobody sitting on my car!! Hehe.... it worked :) Not only is my car safer now, I got me some allies in case other kids want to sit.

Every Saturday I go to my dads office to offer any kind of help with the financial and administrative issues. But every time I go, I go half asleep, cos its a pain in the ass driving all the way to Sulaibiya. Yesterday, I got there half asleep at 8:30 a.m. and a little before reaching there, I had to take a U-turn. This car flies right past me to get to the U-turn first, takes it without paying attention to the traffic coming his way. This was the outcome! Luckily both drivers were ok. There are a LOT of crazy drivers out there, but the ratio of those drivers in Kuwait seems to be growing drastically.

For some weird reason, Wataniya Telecom has been really pissing me off the past few days. Out of nowhere, I would suddenly lose all ability to make and receive calls although the reception bar is at its fullest. I would try switching the phone off and back on, and still nothing. It would remain in that state for 30 mins at least then back to normal; and it didnt happen once or twice, it was happening quite frequently throughout the days.

I know I've been nagging and complaining a lot about the traffic but.................. WHAT THE HELL!!! My working hours at the bank are from 9:30 to 2:30 now, and only the banking sector and financial institutions have those hours. Government offices start at 8:30 and so do schools. Yet today, it took me 50 minutes to get to work. The traffic was insane! The people were insane! And for some odd reason, the traffic lights take more time to turn green now! There are cops everywhere that are NOT controlling traffic and it feels like am in some kind of bump-car area in an entertainment park! You had those people zigzaging on the highway moving the leftmost lane to the rightmost without giving signals or looking in the mirror, then you got those idiots who stick to your car from the back only cos they think they will get there faster, and the worst are those who want to start a third lane in a two lane road. I dont know how I got to work without losing it. Because of today, I got some options to think of..... 1. Move and live somewhere else. 2. Find me a new road to get to work 3. Wake up much earlier 4. Buy me a monster truck and run over those idiots like the bugs they are:) I like #4 :D

It was crazy getting to work today!! I got into my car, put in a chill-out CD, and began driving to work. First, there was the school in front of my house with dozens of kids everywhere not to mention those sitting on my car, for some reason they like sitting on my car, maybe its cos its one of the few that is always washed and clean. Anyway, it took over 30 mins to get out of Hawally and on the 4th Ring Road cos of the traffic. When I finally got on it, I thought the traffice would be less..... it got worse. And then came the 5th ring road where the traffic was moving but it was filled with stupid crazy drivers who are mostly fasting and cant wait till they get to their offices to sit and relax. Seriously, fasting makes so many people supid and even more useless drivers. The traffic was insane today. I passed by the exit into Shuwaikh and I was thankful my work is not there. I also heard on the radio that the ministry of interior is majorly fed up with all the traffice violations going on and are launching a serious campaign to fight it. Anyone who seriously breaks traffic laws will have his license withdrawn. So far, during the past month over 600 licenses were taken away and over 10,000 files have been placed under review. They mean business so SHAPE UP!!!!! Its about time someone did something about those retarded drivers out there.

Yesterday at Palms, my friends and I were taking some pics and everyone was cool with it. We took max 3 pics when a security dude came up to me and asked me to stop taking pics!! I mean, what the fuck is that? If I were some guy sitting alone, checking out the girls in swim suits, and taking pics, then I would understand. But we were taking pics of each other and, still, we were asked to stop. I tried to get it through his thick head that we all are willingly taking pics, even the girls, but he still insisted on me putting it away. I asked him why are pics not allowed... he just said these are the rules. And damn was he rude, felt like smacking him. So I just told him ok... and took pics behind his back anyway :) What's next? We have to wear blind folds so that we cant see anything!!

When I came to work today, I found that my chair was gone!! Apparently my tissue box wasn't enough. They also stole my chair!!! So I'm typing this while standing waiting for my chair to be found..... DAMN AM I PISSED OFF!!!!!!! This is too funny..... LOL

Update: They found it. Funny thing is that I asked the teaboy who found where it was didnt answer; he just panicked and looked nervous. Hmmmm, I have a suspect..... I should stake his house out tonight:P

Someone at work keeps stealing my tissue box!! I know I can get one whenever I want but its annoying going and asking for one. And I feel stupid locking a stupid tissue box in my drawer. I need at least 5 boxes per month. I was thinking of putting some kind of mark on this new one and wait till it disappears then, when it does, I will hunt him down!!! :) Asshole.

Yesterday I went with Nathaly to Columbus Cafe to have a coffee and work on some papers she had to submit for uni. So I get my trustworth Coffee Toffee and she gets her Cafe Latte and we grab a table. Next to us were two guys sitting on the comfortable couches, we took one of their tables and wooden chairs cos there was nowhere to sit. A few minutes later, one of them asks us to watch the table and not let anyone sit, so I told him no problem. He leaves his car key on the table and heads off. So the table is there, nobody sitting on it, shiny clean, with nothing but a car key on it. Logically, people are gonna want to sit., so I put my phone on it cos nobody paid attention to the key. And as more and more people came to sit, we kept brushing them off; at least 20 people wanted the table. This went on for half an hour or so. At one point, we were pretty convinced that either those guys were not coming back or it was some sort of joke and there were cameras watching us. So Nathaly and I were looking around for any cameras or anything that looked suspicious :P I even hid my cigarettes in case.... We reached a point that we just wanted to leave but felt bad leaving the guys' tablel; however, we decided to get outta there and leave some kind of note with a waiter. Just then, the two guys come walking in with a bag in their hand...... THEY WENT SHOPPING!!!!!! I looked at them thinking to myself..... ASSHOLES! Gave them a piece of my mind cos we spent our time guarding their table and not for ourselves. Still, I must admit, I felt kinda dumb looking around for cameras thinking someone will pop up saying "Smile, ur on candid camera!":) Those people could be anywhere anytime...

My car was dead yesterday, today its alive. Yes it was the battery, I was wrong...... Had to buy a new one cos the old one is totally dead. I filled it up with gas too :D

After taking Steve to the airport, we all head to Souk Sharq. It was 7:30 and there was not a single parking spot!!! I drove around for 20 minutes then we just gave up and decided to go elsewhere. This is pathetic! I mean at 7:30 and the largest mall with the largest parking is full. Its the same case with all the more popular malls in the country. Ok.. granted, people dont have that many choices for entertainment, especially the younger people but, then again, I never thought I would have to go early to a mall to find a place; usually I would do that at a club or restaurant, in Kuwait, but a mall???!!!???

Today I had to go to the Criminal Investigations (translated from Arabic) building in Kuwait City to get fingerprinted for my residency. I went at around 11:00 a.m. and it was boiling hot. I couldnt hold the steering wheel. Whats worse is that I was wearing a tie and suit. And when I got there, they kept sending me from floor to floor, and it was all pointless cos I kept asking the wrong people, who turned out to be the dumbest and such a waste of oxygen, cos everything I had to do was on the same floor, no need to jump around from place to place. When I finally finished all the paperwork, I finally got to fingerprint corner and..... I felt like a criminal. He was wearing those white gloves and grabbed my fingers, one by one, after soaking them with ink ofcourse, and pressed them on a yellow card board paper. Now that my fingers are all ink and no way I could drive, he just screams out "Next" and Im pushed out. So I spend another 15 mins holding my keys and phone in my mouth looking for a bathroom. I finally found one, got cleaned up and went around looking for tissue. Anyway, I'm back at my office now in the A/C..... aaaaaaaaaaaahhhhhhhhhhh :)